Vampire Survivors review: an unquestionably compulsive treat until you reach the endgame

Vampire Survivors is morish. Pulsating lights stretch in a vertical column from the top to the bottom of my screen, scattering into deadly particles like notes played on an accordion of cosmic destruction. Fireworks burst in every corner, thanks to the evolved version of my diamond-spewing runetracer weapon that’s now called ‘NO FUTURE’. Monsters go pop by their thousands. Flaming meteors still abound.

Vampire Survivors is an arcade-style survivathon about weaving through fields of enemies as your weapons automatically obliterate the oncoming hordes. It’s still about collecting upgrades until you’re the locus of an unstoppable death machine, and now that it’s left early access that death machine comes in more colours and more flavours. There are new maps to conquer, new characters to conquer with, and new secrets to uncover. If you haven’t played since the early access launch then yes, it’s worth checking out the new stuff. If you haven’t played at all, then God yes, please check out all the stuff. Or like, most of it.

Vampire Survivors is still morish. Up to a point.

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