The last time I was in Paris I saw a game developer climb into a giant, plastic skull and bathe in red wine. Which is to say, the bar for exciting Paris happenings has been set pretty high. Did I expect Assassin’s Creed Valhalla’s Parisian adventure to meet it? I did not. The previous DLC, Wrath Of The Druids, was an underwhelming trip to Ireland that recycled the main game’s settlement development and conspirator assassinations. These ideas were frayed by the end of the campaign, let alone after enduring the rough baggage handling at Irish border control. Chances of surviving yet another long haul journey? Not good.
You certainly fear the worst at The Siege Of Paris’s outset: it’s another of Eivor’s viking pals asking you to visit another farflung region where another local despot is bumping heads with the invaders. That the main story consists of similar regional yarns means any DLC excursions slot neatly into the whole, but it also results in repetition. Go to a place, learn the stakes, make a decision, go home. In this case it’s Charles the Fat causing grief, with his habit of decorating the French countryside with headless settlers. He isn’t subtle, but I do welcome this ogre of a baddie, given the villain-shaped hole in Valhalla proper.